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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
A man was charged with fatally shooting his attacker.
The prosecution described that the defendant shot wildly six times, emptying his gun into his victim, which caused his death.
The defense argued that six out of six shots, carefully aimed at the falling corpse, struck the target in a 1" pattern, therefore does not in any way shape or form constitute "wild shooting".
The defendant was acquitted.

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355 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
These are good too... Supposedly actual quotes from other court cases...

Funny Things Said During Actual Courtroom Testimony

Q: Are you sexually active?
A: No, I just lie there.:-o

Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.:-|

Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.:)

Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you\'ve

Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can\'t remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years.:-?

Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that
A: He said, \"Where am I, Cathy?\"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan.:-o

Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo?
A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo.:mrgreen:

Q: Now doctor, isn\'t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he
doesn\'t know about it until the next morning?:oops:

Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?:shock:

Q: Were you present when your picture was taken?:oops:

Q: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time?:-o

Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls?:oops:

Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated?:-?

Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female?:oops:

Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition notice that I sent to your attorney?
A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.:p

Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.:razz:

Q: All your responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.;-)

Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr.. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing
an autopsy.:p

Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?;-)

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when
you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law somewhere.:-o

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355 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
If you want some really interesting reading pick up copies of your local penal, civil & vehicle codes. I bet you would be astonished at how some of the laws are written.
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