Thoughts on Funerals Since Nobody is Getting Out of This Alive!
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Thoughts on Funerals Since Nobody is Getting Out of This Alive!

This is a discussion on Thoughts on Funerals Since Nobody is Getting Out of This Alive! within the General Prepper and Survival Talk forums, part of the Survivalist, Prepper, Bushcrafter, Forest Rangers category; People die, that's the way it is. I believe that Conventional Funerals are a colossal waste of time and money and usually end up extremely ...

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Thread: Thoughts on Funerals Since Nobody is Getting Out of This Alive!

  1. #1
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    Thoughts on Funerals Since Nobody is Getting Out of This Alive!

    People die, that's the way it is.

    I believe that Conventional Funerals are a colossal waste of time and money and usually end up extremely stressful for the family members and loved ones.

    Many years ago I decided that I would not attend Conventional Funerals for casual friends when someone dies, especially if I do not know the people very well. I'd rather spend some time individually or in a small group with the friend or loved one that I cared about who lost somebody vs being part of this huge show that doesn't benefit most people but is more traumatic on some people during a difficult time.

    This bullshit of spending money and time with a funeral home, buying an over priced gaudy ass coffin and attending a viewing hosted by someone that in most cases does not even know the deceased person but is profiting from it, is not for me. Plus I do not visit any dead people relatives or not, who are in graves in a cemetary, that makes no sense to me.

    Same goes for the uncomfortable church services and then showing up at someones home bringing food and fumbling around not knowing what to say.

    My wishes for me are to be cremated and either Mrs S or our Sons have a damn party at Slippy Lodge and tell funny stories about what a dopey kid I was all of my life. Eat some good BBQ and if you are inclined, have a few sips of what I enjoyed to remember me. Then take my ashes and put them in a Pine Box--that one day I hope my grandkids and I can build together--if I ever have any grandkids, and they can decorate the box in their own childish ways...just like me!

    Anyway, just wondering what you knuckleheads think about funerals?
    Last edited by Slippy; 01-16-2020 at 08:42 AM.

  2. #2
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    At 8 to 10k minimum for the 3 day event us old folks grew up with. Yeah Im thinking the blast furnace then toss my in the wind at the deer blind or mix ashes with lime to throw in the 10 year hole at the outhouse.
    "The clever cat eats cheese and breathes down rat holes with baited breath." W. C. Fields
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  3. #3
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    Aw jeezus Slippy Nothin like a tension breaker!

    I've been to enough funerals, done with 'em.
    If I die inside, cremation & ash scattering up here for me
    If I die outside, I'll feed the coyotes & ravens & worms, and happy to do so!
    Life & death make a perfect circle; it's been a good ride.
    Vanished, into the mist.

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  5. #4
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    The Squatch will except nothing less than a Viking funeral. I will direct Hot Nursey and the kids to put my dead butt on a boat in the nearest lake or ocean and cast me off. They will then raise their bows and shoot flaming arrows at my death barge until one hits it setting it ablaze. That is what the Squatch wants.

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    Last edited by Sasquatch; 01-16-2020 at 09:59 AM.
    Slippy, hawgrider, Inor and 5 others like this.
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  6. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sasquatch View Post
    The Squatch will except nothing less than a Viking funeral. I will direct Hot Nursey and the kids to put my dead butt on a boat in the nearest lake or ocean and cast me off. They will then raise their bows and shot flaming arrows at my death barge until one hits it setting it ablaze. That is what the Squatch wants.

    Sent from my SM-G950U using Tapatalk
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    Vanished, into the mist.

  7. #6
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    When I go, direct to the incinerator and then a mason jar.

    Do not want my departure even listed in the obit's.

    I do not go to funerals, last one I went to was in 1957, was dragged along.

    Did not go to grand parents (just one when 9 years old, it scared the living hell out of me), parents, or brother.

    Have not and will not go to friends close or not, have already told relatives of some I do not and would not go.
    Chiefster23, hawgrider and Slippy like this.

  8. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by SOCOM42 View Post
    When I go, direct to the incinerator and then a mason jar.

    Do not want my departure even listed in the obit's.

    I do not go to funerals, last one I went to was in 1957, was dragged along.

    Did not go to grand parents (just one when 9 years old, it scared the living hell out of me), parents, or brother.

    Have not and will not go to friends close or not, have already told relatives of some I do not and would not go.
    Yeah its tough having that last image of a loved one in a casket embedded in memory for the rest of your life. I'd rather remember them while they were alive. My first one was great grandfather at age 6.

    I remember him laying in state to this day vividly!.
    SOCOM42, Slippy and Prepared One like this.
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  9. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by hawgrider View Post
    Yeah its tough having that last image of a loved one in a casket embedded in memory for the rest of your life. I'd rather remember them while they were alive. My first one was great grandfather at age 6.

    I remember him laying in state to this day vividly!.
    Could not have expressed it any better!
    hawgrider and Slippy like this.

  10. #9
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    Agree with Slippy 100%. Would rather not have my last memory of someone I cared about be of them on display in a fricken box. At some stupid religious ceremony.

    Burn me up and throw what's left in a coffee can or Tupperware bowl. Hopefully one of my buddies will take me for one last motorcycle ride. Run it up to 100 plus and pop the top and let me blow away.

  11. #10
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    I already told my kids I am getting cremated the money saved to do would make a nice family vacation anything is better than putting it in the ground.
    I gave them options for my ashes
    Plant a tree on me
    Load me in some hunting rounds
    Or spread me with 5lbs of tannerite

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