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Well, POO!!!!

3K views 21 replies 13 participants last post by  OctopusPrime 
#1 ·
There's a prep out there that I have never heard ANYBODY talking about, one that to me is so staggeringly obvious but I've never seen it mentioned online.

Instead of storing a year's worth of TP for however many people involved, there's a simple, inexpensive and (most importantly) extremely SMALL option for dealing with personal hygiene in the event of a long-term power outage... bidet bottles.

Basically, a bidet bottle is a spray bottle for cleaning your nether regions... you fill it with water before you "do your business" and then, when you are done, you spray yourself clean. It also works for females in place of using toilet paper after urination.

In many countries, bidets are built into public and private homes... they are a standard hygiene device used throughout Europe. They are tied into the plumbing system alongside of (or installed in) toilets for washing people's backsides. Portable bidets are simply smaller, hand held units that you squeeze to provide pressure for washing.

I first discovered them when I had a saddle sore (from riding my bike) that had to be treated several times a day. I have since become a regular user (although, frankly, I "do my paperwork" then I "get that fresh, clean feeling" from the bidet).

SO... since I am a prepper, and since I have used them before, I thought I would do a series of reviews for you guys on different models of bidets.

Some of you all are probably freaking out and saying "gross!" but YOU are going to have to do something if/when you run out of TP... and TP also takes a LOT of space up in your storage area. I definitely would stock one bidet for each person (just like a toothbrush, you don't want to share one of these things) and a couple spares "just in case" one breaks.

Here's a photo of the models I have lined up to test. I will take pictures (pre-use :) ) of each of them as we go along!

 
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#2 ·
Hmmm.... what a choice. Use precious water (Arizona, here) or ....... let's see, what WOULD I use here? No big tree leaves to speak of, no moss, no corn cobs. All the trees and plants have thorns. I think I better just keep stocking up on TP. Or you can do what middle east people do - use a finger of the left hand. It only takes one square of TP to wipe the finger!
 
#12 ·
Honestly, if your goal is long term survival and you choose to live in a desert where water is limited (therefore, growing food is limited), ummm... you've got a lot bigger concerns than how you are going to wipe your butt.

There's a reason virtually nobody lived in Arizona in the pre-industrial age, and those that did were nomads.

If coming up with 12 ounces of non-potable water to bathe with is going to be a serious problem, well... ummm... y'all go ahead, I believe I will live somewhere that it won't be.
 
#8 ·
Well, I have always been told I am full of shit so I need all the help I can get I guess.
 
#6 ·
Sounds like something I should acquire as a just in case. Thanks Salty. Where do you pick this stuff up. Pharmacy?
 
#15 ·
If I run out of tp I have leaves, rags and books. Lots and lots of books. My grandpa used the almanac and the Sears catalog in the old outhouse. Some people used rags. A different color for each person.

Did you know that in ancient Rome they used a sponge on a stick. The sponges were communal too. In other words, there was one sponge on a stick soaking in a bucket of water, and latrine-users would take turns wiping themselves with it. That's nasty.

Here is a picture of some of the best leaves available for wiping booty.

Plant Leaf Groundcover Grass Flowering plant
 
#17 ·
If I run out of tp I have leaves, rags and books. Lots and lots of books. My grandpa used the almanac and the Sears catalog in the old outhouse. Some people used rags. A different color for each person.

Did you know that in ancient Rome they used a sponge on a stick. The sponges were communal too. In other words, there was one sponge on a stick soaking in a bucket of water, and latrine-users would take turns wiping themselves with it. That's nasty.

Here is a picture of some of the best leaves available for wiping booty.

View attachment 11185
You are an evil man. Not as evil as Slippy, but you are evil nonetheless.
 
#19 ·
You can use a dedicated towel after the bidet. Then again you could use a dedicated towel without the bidet........ Toilet paper and showers or baths work real well. Water is not a problem and won't be until the next Ice age. But then I would be moving south - either ahead of the ice or in it... ahead is preferable.
 
#21 ·
Maybe a good way to find a companion of the opposite gender? ;)

I think I will use a towel - nobody wants to see my white a$$ swinging in the breeze!
 
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